Friday, January 16, 2009

Going back to Memory Lane. Flashbacks and memories of all sorts.

Flashbacks and Memories:

1. One school day afternoon, 2 years ago, while me, my mom and my dad are having our afternoon snack at Via Mare my dad and I started a conversation that went like this:

Dad: "How many 
years before you finish college?"
Me: "3 and a half and I'm on my 3rd already."
Dad: "So, you should get a high paying job after that. Your tuition fee is so expensive. Don't tell me you're going to have a job that pays minimum." (jokingly)
Me: "Of course not Daddy. When I get a job, what do you want me to buy you? A new car? A new house? A Caribbean cruise? A new Cartier? A new LV? Tell me." (smiling and half-joking)
Dad: "Nah, just buy me a new Rolex."
Me: "Just a Rolex? Okay, that's easy. Kayang-kaya!" (laughing)

Why am I sharing this conversation? Because, last night I had a dream and it was about my promised Rolex to my Dad. I can't remember clearly how my dream went but I remember my Dad reminding me about it. That's clearly a
 sign that I should get a job already if I want
 to save enough money to buy him that watch. Of course he is not around to wear it but maybe I'll give it to my brother instead.

Anyway, after lunch today I went to the cemetery and visited my Dad's grave. I told him that I didn't forget that promise and I would keep it and save for it. It's the first and last promise I made him (other than finishing college) and I'm going to keep it! It's nothing compared to all the hard work and the love that he gave me and my siblings. 

2. I'm having quite an emotional meltdown because of all the things 
and people that I keep missing. 

My friends, my school and going to school, the way life used to be for me, my Dad and I also have to handle the stress and pressure of landing on a job by the end
 of February. It's overwhelming that I am already turning 22 this year and I have to
 work already and earn and save up. This is real life slapping me in the face telling me that I should stand up on my own and that my parents wouldn't be around long enough to still cradle me and provide for everything I need and want in life. There are just too much realizations for me to handle all at once.

3. I remember Bar Management class in College. 
Especially the Barlab class where we get to drink beer, vodka, cocktails, brandy, and all the other alcoholic drinks you
 could think of. Of course we are excused and Bar classes are mostly the last class that's available in our schedule so as to avoid attending other classes drunk and tipsy to pay attention to the lecture. It was always a fun class to attend to. I don't think I ever cut that subject. Okay, maybe just one time.

4. I miss being carefree. Where I don't have to worry about adult stuffs like monthly bills and going to work and making ends meet. 
Where I only think about final exams, recitations and course card distributions as my MAJOR problems. I miss cramming for the deadlines and having a good laugh about it with my friends. I miss getting high grades. 

I miss how everything were. I just miss everything. 

7 comments on "Going back to Memory Lane. Flashbacks and memories of all sorts."

fedhz on January 16, 2009 at 7:00 PM said...

Yeah, I understand how you feel about missing people and school life. I wasn't able to go to college and I had to work at age 16, so that realization of me working has long been slapped on my face as early as 4th grade when my dad stopped working after an accident.

That's okay. you have friends to support you. Good luck in your job. I know you can do it!

JeD Chan on January 17, 2009 at 12:28 AM said...

Awww...the nostalgia! I'm really weak on this kind of stuffs..I remember the days when I just want to press pause to step on the breaks to somehow stop the time. I really miss going to school, in fact I'm thinking of going back. Well, Life goes on for us, but looking back once in a while won't hurt. ;)

By the way, What's your course and What school?

Mara on January 17, 2009 at 12:50 AM said...

@fedhz: Thanks fedhz! I remember when I told my Dad I want to work part time when I was in 2nd yr college, he got mad. :))

@jed: Hi jed! I took up HRIM in CSB. :)

lace. on January 17, 2009 at 1:26 AM said...

what a sad entry :(

Grandy on January 17, 2009 at 11:39 AM said...

Oh Mara what a sweet memory of your dad. I need to drive down and see my Dad's grave. I haven't been there in about 4 years. I don't's a long drive and there are a lot of excuses between here and there.

Transition is hard missy. Just remember, this is a phase that will pass. You will find that job and make new friends, and the light at the end of the tunnel will no longer feel like a train coming at you on the other end. ;)

mye on January 17, 2009 at 8:07 PM said...

hey - you've got new online buddies here!

by the way, i have a tag for you. do visit

JeD Chan on January 21, 2009 at 3:11 PM said...

Whaaat? hahaha I also took up HRIM at CSB. In what batch are you? :) My major is tourism. :)


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